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Surround yourself with people and with love (and healthy relationships, not dependencies or problems) and you will find a great guy. Until two years ago, the longest relationship I'd had was one that lasted six months and was heartbreaking. And I think that happiness is what attracted my guy to me.

The relationships were, in order, 32 months, 6, months, 6 months, and 3 months.

They were well spaced, as well (years in between them).

I had a best friend later on who was HIV the whole time I knew him. I know he was afraid of infecting anyone, and shut down sexually until the day he died. He is the person I miss the most among my dead friends.

I'm 48, and I've had 4 'relationships' (note the quotes), and a handful of two week flings.

Pushing 50 and haven't been in a committed relationship in 7 years.

The last one I knew wouldn't last going into it but it still hurt to let go. Relationships aren't all rainbows and unicorns, OP. As I've gotten older, I realize that I hid myself when I was younger.

I have questioned whether I chased men away, chased the wrong ones too long, or I was just made that way. I just accept my journey and try to live in my moments.

I had one guy who'd send me flowers, bottles of champagne, take me to piano bars and have arranged for the singer to sing strategic songs "at" me, designed to make me fall in love with him.

I've gone this long without it, I don't really care until I hear stuff about how people in relationships are happier and live longer. OP, get off the fucking computer, and go and meet people. Just meet people and build community, and you'll eventually meet your man.

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